I Forgot The U
by Jeune Ecrivain
Summary: Phil and Keely are married. Phil is now 22, and Keely's about 21 and 6 months. When Phil's birthday coincides with Keely having big news, she conspires with Pim to tell him in a most creative way. COMPLETED TWO-SHOT. RATING FOR SAFETY
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is based on characters and situations owned by the Walt Disney Company. No copyright infringement is intended, and no profit is being made from this. The followingis purely for entertainment.

**I Forgot the U**

**By Jeune Ecrivain**

**Rating: K+**

**Summary: Phil is now 22 and Keely's about 21 ½. When Phil's birthday coincides with Keely having big news, she conspires with Pim to tell him in a most creative way. **

"I told you not to make a big thing out of this!" said Phil Diffy to the crowd before him, feeling a treasonous smile spread across his face despite himself. "Ugh! Doesn't anybody listen to me anymore?" he asked no one in particular, making a last attempt to keep a straight face in light of the familiar faces smiling knowingly at him.

Phil had come home to his apartment anxious to think about something else besides job interviews for the first time that day. He had found it a little harder than usual to find a decent company that needed the services of a biologist fresh out of college, but he had risen to the challenge and had what he thought were a few promising interviews. Before he had known it, his 22nd-birthday, which had been looming just around the corner, had finally arrived. He really should've known that his entire immediate family and close friends from high school would jump out from a myriad of hiding places and shout "Surprise!" the minute he turned the light on, but in a moment of ignorance he had flipped the light switch, and he had been ambushed by a modest but close-knit and loving group of smiling faces.

Giving him a smile that was both warm and sly at the same time, his wife of hardly three years stepped up to him, put a party hat on his head, and kissed him sweetly. "Phil, Phil, Phil," said Keely Diffy, shaking her head. "You should know us better than that."

"You know, I really should," agreed her husband with a roll of his eyes. Phil then turned to face his parents, sister, friends Tia and Seth, his sister's friends Brad Farmer and Debbie Berwick (if they could really be called friends), and even his favorite professor from college. "Alright! Whose idea was this?"

"I take full responsibility," said Tia. "Though I must say the Diffy Sisters-in-Law didn't exactly try to talk me out of it."

"Yeah!" Pim and Keely cheered, high-fiving each other in mutual congratulation.

"Phil," began Lloyd Diffy, approaching his son with a small but proud smile on his face, "if you have one more birthday and make me feel any older,…" At this, hearty chuckles and giggles sounded from the gathering. "…I'm going to disown you."

Phil finally broke down and chuckled out loud. "I'll keep that in mind."

"Happy birthday, son!" Lloyd digressed from his joke, slapping Phil on the back.

Keely and Pim furtively exchanged mischievous looks. If Lloyd Diffy felt old now, they couldn't wait to see how he would react to what they had in store. Even the other two masterminds behind the party (Tia and Phil's mother Barbara) weren't aware of this little addition they had schemed by themselves. Before the party was over, the Diffy Sister-in-Laws would strike again.

Seeing anticipation dance in Keely's eyes, Pim picked up the pizza cutter that was laying next to a stack of a half-dozen pizzas on the coffee table and held it like a brave soldier would a sword. "Well, what's the holdup?" she queried as if giving a battle cry. "Let's get this party started!"

Unanimous agreement easily procured, the small crowd dissolved into a more dispersed celebratory gathering. Before Keely and Phil joined in, Phil whispered in her ear, "You really shouldn't have."

"I had to," said Keely stubbornly.

"Why?" Phil challenged her.

She smiled at him so warmly his mock resolve melted, her blue eyes glinting in a way he hadn't seen before. She kissed him on the nose and stated simply, "Because I love you." With that, she took his hand and yanked him out of his position in front of the doorway before he could respond. In that moment, Phil realized that any remaining pretense of objection would be in vain. When his wife looked at him like that, there was no saying no to her. Besides, the informality of the celebration made it seem almost petty to complain even in jest.

So, the party went on. Tia was soon yakking away about single life to Keely, almost seeming as if she felt obligated to do so since Keely had withdrawn from bachelorhood three years ago. She found herself nodding amusedly at Tia, realizing how little she had changed. Yet her mind drifted more than once to the plot that she and Pim had concocted, growing more anxious with each passing minute to unveil the big surprise and see everyone's reaction, especially Phil's. She momentarily wondered if it might temporarily steal the spotlight from Phil more than would seem right, but the thought soon vanished. It wouldn't matter. She knew it.

Meanwhile, her co-conspirator was busy exchanging witticisms with one friend and just plain dishing them out to the other. "So, Brad," said Pim as she finished off her slice of chocolate cake, "I've been meaning to tell you that I was flipping through our old seventh-grade yearbook, and I found a picture of you. I have to say… I think I know why we get along just a little bit better now."

"Oh, yeah," said Brad, eyeing her defiantly. "What's that?"

"Now I can be seen with you and not look like Snow White and the Obnoxious Dwarf."

Debbie couldn't help herself from laughing, which was unfortunate since she had just taken a slug of soda. Pim turned her face towards Debbie in an attempt to look aloof and ended up being sprayed with half-drunk Coke. Pim closed her eyes briefly in self-restraint before staring with bland annoyance away from both her "friends."

"Oh, my gosh, Pim!" cried Debbie in her almost inhumanly sweet voice. "I'm so sorry!"

"No, no," interrupted Brad with a grin on his face. "I like this look. It suits her," he said, tucking a wet strand of hair behind her ear teasingly with a hand that Pim quickly slapped away.

"You…" Pim began, "…are such an egotist!" she branded him, turning her whole body to face him fully.

"And you…" Brad countered, closing the distance between them, "…are a sarcastic know-it-all!"

Pim was about to retort when she heard furious scribbling behind her. She blinked, bit her lip in annoyance, and turned to face Debbie again. "What are you doing?" she asked, referring to the notepad that Debbie was holding.

"It's for my psychology class," she replied. "I'm doing this project on why idle hostility is sometimes a sign of masked attraction."

"You have got…to be joking," said Pim very deliberately.

"No, of course not," responded Debbie.

Pim opened her mouth to respond, but Keely chose that moment to arrive on the scene. "Pim," she said, "I think it's time for Phil to open his present." Keely gave her sister-in-law an implying glare, and a hint of a smile could be seen briefly on Pim's lips.

"Right," said Pim, swiftly excusing herself to seek out her brother.

"I thought we said no gifts," Debbie almost whined, ready to go an a guilt trip for not having brought anything.

"We did," Keely reassured her. "Don't worry. This is just something special I have for Phil. Trust me. This'll be all the gift Phil will need. It's sort of a…husband-wife thing."

Debbie nodded, not looking quite so sure. Keely knew, however, that she would soon understand.

Pim found her older brother on the couch talking to Seth about the latest football game. She sat down discretely and pretended to stew over a fake e-mail she had created just before the party. She grunted loudly, and Phil turned his attention to her to find her pouting over a piece of paper. To reel him in, Pim topped her act off by pretending to scoff unhappily.

Phil took the bait. "Is something wrong, Pim?"

"Oh, it's nothing," Pim said, making a show of crinkling her nose, which Phil had admitted to recognizing as a sure sign of trouble with his sister.

"Alright," Phil shifted his posture towards her. "Something's up. C'mon. Give."

"What makes you think something's up?" Pim asked innocently.

"You crinkled your nose."

Pim pretended to look hesitant, but she was really congratulating herself on her acting. "Fine," she finally feigned surrender. "You know how I have absolutely no clue what kind of career I want to have?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Keely said that maybe I'd make a good actress."

"Actress?" Phil repeated, looking puzzled and surprised at the idea.

"Yeah. It sounded weird to me too," admitted Pim. "But anyway, Keely happened to know the director of some theater group here in Pickford."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He…uh…was in one of her music classes in college. Small world, huh?"

"Indeed," said Phil, still having trouble seeing his sister as a drama queen.

"So Keely puts in a good word for me, and I auditioned."

"And?" Phil urged her on hopefully.

"I got this e-mail yesterday from Keely. Jim, her director friend, got back with her, and he did give me a part."

"That's great!" Phil replied.

"You'd think so wouldn't you?"

Phil looked at his sister, puzzled. Pim handed him the e-mail. He read it:

_Pim, _

_Great news! You're going to be an ant!_

_I'm so excited!_

_Keely_

"An ant?"

"Yeah," Pim confirmed. "Apparently, there's this scene where all these different insects do a dance number in a field of giant grass blades. I auditioned for the lead role, and all I got was a part with no lines and the provision that I make a fool of myself prancing around stage in a giant ant costume."

"What kind of play is this?"

"What kind of play is what?" asked Keely, arriving almost as if on cue.

"This play you had Pim audition for."

"An ant?" Pim pretended to round on Keely. "You got me an audition so I could be an ant! A disgusting insect that crawls around like Earth's tiniest knuckle-draggers! Is that the best you can do? What kind of play is this?"

"Pim, calm down," Phil said. "I'm sure Keely's intentions were good."

Keely smiled inwardly as she put her best acting skills to work. "I never said you were going to be an ant in the play, Pim," she stated, feigning confusion. "I don't know anything yet. Jim hasn't told me anything."

"Then what's this?" Pim retorted, snatching the paper from Phil's hands. Keely pretended to look at it, then let out her most realistic laugh. "Pim! This has nothing to do with the play! It has to do with a big event in the family!"

"Huh?" Pim pretended to ask quizzically.

"What does Pim being an ant have to do with a big event in the family?" Phil inquired, more perplexed than ever.

By now, Pim was pursing her lips, nearly bursting with anticipation. Keely herself had trouble keeping a straight face. "I misspelled 'ant,' silly me!"

"No offense, Keely,…" Phil began carefully. "…but how do you misspell 'ant'?"

Keely smiled warmly at Phil, which confused him even more, and with a strange happiness dancing in her eye, she answered simply. "I forgot the 'u.'"


	2. Chapter 2

**I Forgot the U**

**By Jeune Ecrivain**

**Rating: T**

**Summary: Phil is now 22 and Keely's about 21 ½. When Phil's birthday coincides with Keely having big news, she conspires with Pim to tell him in a most creative way. **

**A/N: The rating increase is just a precaution due to some mild references to implied sex.**

**Part 2**

For a second, Phil didn't get it. Then, his mental gears appeared to click and his eyes widened almost cartoonishly. He stood up slowly, staring at his wife in awe. "Keely…" he said. "…what are you trying to tell me?"

"What do you think I'm trying to tell you?" she teased while simultaneously beaming at him.

Phil's astonishment finally weakened enough to allow a weak grin and chuckle, an infant joy in his eyes that was just waiting to be validated. "You…I mean, you're…," he stammered. He finally closed his agape mouth and started over. "You're not messing with me, are you?"

"About something like this?" said Keely, offended in a light-hearted way. "I would never!"

Astonishment was gradually but visibly giving way to joy on Phil's face. He placed a hand on each of his wife's shoulders and looked in her eyes. "Say it. I need to hear you say it."

Smiling warmly at him once again, she happily obliged. "Phil,…I'm pregnant."

"Oh, my God, Keel!" he said, cupping her cheek in his hand and kissing her sweetly. "This is wonderful!"

"Happy birthday, Phil!"

"Happy birthday!" Phil repeated with a laugh. "Happy birthday, she says!" he laughed out loud and hugged Keely, picking her up off her feet and spinning her in three complete circles. When he finally put her down, he ambushed her with questions so eagerly he only said the first word or two of each coherently. "How…? When…?"

"Well, duh, you know how," Keely said with a small blush appearing on her cheeks.

Neither husband nor wife noticed the young aunt-to-be crinkle her nose for real to form an expression that clearly said _I really didn't need to hear that._

"But when did you find out?" Phil asked.

"About three days ago."

"Three days ago! You've known about this for three days and you're telling me now?"

Keely laughed. "Well, it was just so close to your birthday, I thought it would make the perfect birthday surprise!" she defended convincingly.

Phil beamed at her, then gave her a playful look. "Is this because of that one time Tia took us to Starbucks a little late in the evening and we had trouble falling asleep that night?"

Keely blushed hard, and Pim had finally heard enough. "Good God!" the younger female exclaimed, glaring at her brother and sister-in-law. "Look, I love you both, and I'm sure I'm going to love my nephew or niece, but if you two ever give me a mental image like that again, I guarantee you that you will be sorry!"

"Sorry," said Phil, chuckling at how silly he and Keely were acting and at his sister's reaction. He turned back and looked warmly at his wife. "After all," he said softly, stroking her chin gently, "who cares exactly how or when this happened? The point is…the woman I love is giving me one of the greatest gifts since she we got married."

"Don't give me all the credit," said Keely. "You had something to do with it, too."

"Ugh!" grunted Pim in exasperation. "Here we go…"

"I'm just saying…" protested Keely, glancing at Pim before turning her affectionate gaze back on her husband, "…this isn't my gift to you. It's our gift to each other…and to the family."

"Couldn't have said it better myself," stated Phil. "So, was there ever really a play?"

Keely shook her head.

"It was all a ploy just to tell me the greatest news of my life?"

Keely nodded cleverly.

"I thought so," Phil nodded back. "Before today, I don't think either you or I would've suggested that Pim be an actress."

"What do you mean 'before today?'" Pim inquired.

"Are you kidding me?" Phil chuckled. "You totally had me going just now!"

Pim smirked confidently, though a vestige of a certain childish pride shone in her eyes. "Well, you know me. Sometimes I can surprise you," she replied.

"And you were fantastic!" Phil said to Keely, kissing her squarely on the lips. "You both had me going."

Pim and Keely high-fived each other proudly.

"How did you ever come up with that whole 'ant'/'aunt' thing?"

"Well, Pim found out the big news accidentally," began Keely.

"Accidentally?"

"Long story," Pim interjected.

"I was just going to sit in your lap and tell you, but Pim just insisted we get creative with it."

"Just like you, Pim," Phil quipped.

"Thank you," Pim responded with a theatrical bow.

"So, does anyone else know?" asked Phil anxiously.

"No," Keely answered.

Phil beamed once more. "Excellent!" With that, he grabbed his drink, stepped up onto the coffee table, and called out to the gathering, "Hey, everybody!"

Phil's family and friends turned their heads one by one to face the birthday boy, who looked very much the part with his ear-to-ear grin and eyes shining with happiness. "I'm sure we all remember Dad's little comment about feeling old,…and I say to him now…get ready to feel even older."

Hearty laughs sounded from the group.

Phil opened his mouth to continue, but instead turned to Keely and said, "This is as much your news as it is mine. Why don't you tell them?"

"No, honey. It's your birthday. You tell them."

"No, really. You tell them."

She glared at him playfully. "You."

"You."

"You."

"You."

"Would you just tell us already?" exclaimed Tia. "Happy couples," she added with a roll of her eyes.

"Seriously, Keel, I want you to tell them," said Phil, extending his hand to her.

She smiled at him, unable to say no, and took his hand. He helped her up onto the coffee table. Taking Phil's hand in hers, she smiled brightly and said, "Phil and I…are going to have a baby!"

Practically every female in the room squealed, and the males cheered and whooped. From that moment on, the party was as much for Keely as it was for Phil. But Phil didn't mind. He and the woman he loved were having a child together, and that was all that mattered.


End file.
